'Pepsi' is not going to be the sponsor of IPL 2014.
The new sponsor is going to be
'Whisper'
....because IPL is going through its worst 'period'!
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Sunday, May 26, 2013
More jokes on Cricket spot fixing
What did CSK do after losing the first 2 seasons of IPL?
They just 'fixed' it..
Classic spot fixing dilemma
Bowler is paid to give away atleast 20 runs in an over and the batsman is paid to score no runs in an over..
It will be real fun to watch...
Why is CSK Jersey Yellow in Color?
Because the owners (Gurunath) knew, they are going to get into deep shit!!
What is Vindoo Singh and Sreesanth discussing in the police custody?
Now that Sreesanth is eligible for next Big Boss season.. How can he survive Big Boss...
What did bookies say after looking at the pitch?
Good betting conditions
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Bruce Lee
Why was Bruce Lee worried when his sister was pregnant?
.
.
.
.
Because.. he will become Mammu Lee..
Management Jokes
Read this in forwarded e-mails.
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.
After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,…
“Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”
Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the administration clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”
Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.
A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,”Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”
Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.
After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,…
“Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”
Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the administration clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”
Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.
A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,”Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”
Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Jokes on Exams and Results
Dad: What's your test result?
Son: Failed in 5 subjects.
Dad: What!!! from now on don't call me DAD okay.
Son: Oh come on dad! Its my school test not a DNA test
Exams are like Girl friends
- Too many questions
- Difficult to understand
- More explanation is needed
- Result is always "You Can Do Better"
The Funniest And
Highly Impossible Message
A Student Can Ever Send
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I Finished Studies.
Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this exam.
Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you !
The funniest situation in student life
when we have no idea what to write in the exam paper n the supervisor comes
and
says, “please cover your answer sheet”
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Aurangzeb
Aurangzeb: Senapati batao ki hum shivaji ko kyo nahin dhund pa rahe hai.....???
(Why are we not able to find Shivaji???)
Senapati: Kyunki Maharaj hum Mughal hai Google nahin :P
(Becoz we are Mughal not Google.. :P)
(Why are we not able to find Shivaji???)
Senapati: Kyunki Maharaj hum Mughal hai Google nahin :P
(Becoz we are Mughal not Google.. :P)
Friday, May 17, 2013
Jokes on Sreesanth
Why did Sreesanth take money to play badly?
If you good at something, never do it for free... B-)
Faking news - Sreesanth agreed for spot-fixing as he needed money to pay for job in Indian Railways
Ashish Nehra to Sreesanth - 'You misused my training'
A towel can make one's career - Ranbir Kapoor
One can make a career without a towel - Sunny Leone
A towel can destroy one's career - Sreesanth
Sreesanth deliberately bowled a No-Ball and police took a free hit...
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